The Incredible Shrinking Family
As mothers, we live in an interesting age and time. Society seems to value children less and less– why? I have lots of personal opinions, *wink* but for now I will only say that I believe that God will help and support those who choose to be parents. Of course, being a mother of a large family, I can accurately say that circumstances are not always easy and never ideal, BUT I have seen how parents trusting in the Lord and His plan for families, no matter the size, has miraculous results. In the following article, statistics are shown that women are having fewer children, if they decide to have children at all:
http://www.foxnews.com/story/0,2933,405942,00.html
What will the future bring? Hopefully, families will not go the way of many parts of Europe, and drive themselves into extinction. Julie B. Beck, President of the LDS Relief Society (a women’s organization with hundreds of thousands of members), said it this way:
Mothers Who Know Bear Children
Mothers who know desire to bear children. Whereas in many cultures in the world children are “becoming less valued,”2 in the culture of the gospel we still believe in having children. Prophets… have declared that “God’s commandment for His children to multiply and replenish the earth remains in force.”3 President Ezra Taft Benson taught that young couples should not postpone having children and that “in the eternal perspective, children—not possessions, not position, not prestige—are our greatest jewels.”4
Faithful daughters of God desire children. In the scriptures we read of Eve (see Moses 4:26), Sarah (see Genesis 17:16), Rebekah (see Genesis 24:60), and Mary (see 1 Nephi 11:13–20), who were foreordained to be mothers before children were born to them. Some women are not given the responsibility of bearing children in mortality, but just as Hannah of the Old Testament prayed fervently for her child (see 1 Samuel 1:11), the value women place on motherhood in this life and the attributes of motherhood they attain here will rise with them in the Resurrection (see D&C 130:18). Women who desire and work toward that blessing in this life are promised they will receive it for all eternity, and eternity is much, much longer than mortality. There is eternal influence and power in motherhood.
Bearing and raising children is not popular in today’s world. Venues and services cater less and less to families with children. For example, there was a recent story in the national news about airline services that separate children and parents from those traveling without children. Many people, including parents, lauded the idea. But what does this say about society’s view– that children are a “nuisance” and should not be heard OR seen?! Are adults without children so easily annoyed that they cannot tolerate non-adults? Why?
Rabbi Shmuley Boteach talks about this issue in a recent article here:
http://www.worldnetdaily.com/news/article.asp?ARTICLE_ID=49074
It is my view that as society continues to disregard the value of children, that cultures, traditions, and morals will continue to be lost. What ideas and thoughts get passed down if no one bears children? Who takes care of the future elderly? Who then moves into influence and power if people today refuse to provide the earth with the people of tomorrow? There ARE people in today’s society who value children and raise large families. Their children will be the ones to create the world of the future.
While my husband and I did not have a large family in order to change society, the things that we are teaching our children though our family culture will have an impact on future generations. Don’t get me wrong– it is NOT without sacrifices! But hopefully my children will realize and understand that children are of great value, that families can have an impact for good, and that each one was welcomed to our home with open arms.
Family size is really immaterial– it is the attitude that is really important. Do we feel our children are bothersome? Do we speak negatively about them and the care and attention they require? (They DO hear our complaints, even when we think they don’t.) Do we resent the sacrifices that come with being a mother? Are we so focused on the annoyance of the moment, that we lose sight of the grander scheme of eternity? We’re all guilty of these tendencies, but we CAN choose to change our hearts and our attitudes. We can choose to see ourselves as the great mothers of nations or as martyrs of our “what-could-have-beens.” Will our daughters and sons want to be parents someday, or are we telling them that children are just too much trouble to bother with.
Children are an asset– not a liability. If we can help ourselves AND others see that, we very well could change the world. One mother at a time…

August 24th, 2008 at 1:02 pm
AMEN! I agree whole heartily with all that you wrote!
As a child I always wanted a large family and spoke of it often. Every time I played house I had at least 12 children. My mom thought I would out grow these “silly notions”.
While I was still in the beginnings of motherhood with three children, I got my patriarchal blessing and my husband received his at the same time. The point that stood out the most to me was one of the first things Heavenly Father told me: “that He was pleased with my decision to have a family”. The other point that helped me realized how important my role in raising my large family was something that was said in my husband’s blessing. He was told that “the influence of our family would bring many people to the gospel.” Those are powerful reminders to me to continue on and to treasure having a family.
We have seven wonderful children now, who knows how many we will be blessed with. My husband and I completely rely on Heavenly Father in regards to this and are blessed tremendously each time we welcome another baby into our home.
Thanks, Rachel, for the wonderful reminder! Sometimes reading something like this is a nice reminder to carry on!
September 2nd, 2008 at 1:20 pm
You’re probably already familiar with this quote:
“When God wants a great work done in the world, or a great wrong righted, he goes about it in a very unusual way. He doesn’t stir up his earthquakes or send forth his thunderbolts. Instead he has a helpless baby born, perhaps in a simple home and of some obscure mother. And then God puts the idea into the mother’s heart and she puts it into the baby’s mind. And then God waits. The greatest forces in the world are not the earthquakes and thunderbolts. The greates forces in the world are babies. And greater than the babies are the mothers who give them life and mold their thoughts and set their higheste ideals. The hand that rocks the cradle is truly the hand that rules the world.” E.T. Sullivan “The Way to Peace,” p. 258